Musings on aloneness versus loneliness

Sometimes it is just lovely to shut oneself away from the world for a few days and to enjoy the peace and quite of ones own company. To be alone with your thoughts in your own private world. I decided to say on in France for a few days after my husband flew back to London on Sunday in pursuit of work and the all illusive salmon in the Scottish highlands. It seemed so quiet after he left and initially I felt lonely all alone in our apartment. How to amuse myself? First a good clear out of my wardrobe as I have just enrolled in Project 333 – Living with Less (if you want to find out more click on the link). I proudly took bagfuls of clothes to the charity shop this morning. The remainder of my summer linens have been washed, ironed, bagged up and stored ready for next year. The flat is scrubbed and cleaned, even the windows sparkle in the unforgiving sunshine. Yesterday afternoon I watched a fascinating documentary on the life of Grace Kelly on French TV. Good for my french, glorious photography and oh how beautifully elegant she was and those amazing outfits. Watching daytime TV is something I rarely do of an afternoon, it must be something to do with the Protestant work ethic.

Another experience I am aware of is how feminine the apartment has become, not just the lack of socks to be picked up from the floor more a sense perfume, manicure and make-up as I have time to experiment and throw away all those old colours that no longer work. The hours stretching in front of me to do with as I please. No set agenda, eat, sleep, watch TV and blog of course.

This whole experience got me thinking about the difference between being alone and enjoying your own company versus feeling lonely. I know that when I lived on my own for eight years in the mid-nineties there were many times when I often felt lonely, especially when the children were away at school. Yet sometimes one can be surrounded by people and still feel a sort of loneliness. I fall somewhere between introverted and extroverted. At times I like to be gregarious and love being with people but once in a while it is relaxing to be able to re-charge my batteries and be comfortable in my own company . Life can be so frantic and fastpaced with so many demands on our time and energy. What do you think?

Contemplating life in the early Autumn sunshine of St. Tropez

Got up early this morning to visit the market in St. Tropez  back in time for my yoga class. Now off to buy some provisions from the local grocery store. Something simple and quick to cook so that I can continue for a few more days in my little cocoon like a fluffy Persian cat stretching and luxuriating in the late summer sunshine without a care in the world.

There is always Skype and facetime if I wish to connect to those I love. I am off now to have a quick Skype. Till we meet again in this space.

Thank you for reading. I really love to hear from you and appreciate the time you take to leave comments.
Fashion and Style, Beauty tips, Lifestyle


  1. 25th September 2012 / 17:21

    Time alone has become such a luxury for me. I love it. I loved reading about how you’re enjoying your time!

  2. 25th September 2012 / 18:26

    The world is so full of noise…especially when you teach…that I have to have down time;quiet time; alone time….I feed off of it. I daily battle for quiet…I actually think I could write a sitcom about it. Good topic.

  3. 25th September 2012 / 18:45

    I always cherish a few hours of me time alone, but my house is always busy with four kids. If you ever need anyone to come and look after your apartment on their own, give me a shout!

  4. 25th September 2012 / 20:37

    I think it’s good to spend time on your own – to relax & unwind – and it’s good to have company too. But having the opportunity to step back, makes you appreciate friends and family just a little bit more.

    PS Love your hat! Where’s it from?

    • 26th September 2012 / 13:05

      Hi I bought the hat in a small shop in St. Tropez it says on the label I also have a classic beige one which I wear nearly every day and it comes from the men’s dept. at MarksandSpencer, size small. They are the best ones and last for ages.

  5. 26th September 2012 / 08:57

    Thank you for this beautiful posting! I know that feeling. It occurs when I fall ill and haven’t seen anyone for a whole day. I desperately need the few words the employee at the bread-counter in the supermarket says to me.
    I get lonely when no words are spoken. I am a woman of speech!

    Cleaning the house is something I can only do when I am angry or have the regular PMS, because that’s when I am full of this “scrubbing-energy”.

    Walks can enhance loneliness enormously, don’t you think?
    Cooking helps, for me.

    best regards, Paula

    pS: I hope you did not get rid of some of the really nice clothes I have seen on your blog over the past year(s)

    • 26th September 2012 / 13:06

      No did not get rid of nice clothes only old ones that I had bought from Uk so they were getting past their sell by date. I am finding that having a half empty wardrobe makes it much easier to decide what to wear.

  6. Cheryl Brown
    26th September 2012 / 16:36

    I loved this post. I’ve gone all summer without buying new clothes except navy t-shirts at the summer sales. I don’t need as many nice clothes now that I am retired. Somedays, I miss my work buddies, however.

    • 26th September 2012 / 16:37

      I agree I miss some of my work companions. However I am beginning to make new friends here in France.

  7. 26th September 2012 / 22:38

    For me, solitude is a great restorer, but only if I know I will connect with friends or my husband. When I lived alone for 5 years in the mid-80s; though I had friends, I had no intimate partner, and was sometimes lonely. It was not unbearable, but it certainly had a different tenor than those alone times now.

    Any sort of day with no agenda is a luxury for so many!

  8. emily
    10th November 2012 / 11:39

    Enjoyed your post; just discovered your blog and smile when I read it. It is a true gift to enjoy your own company. I love my alone time but always happy to welcome my husband back after he’s been away.

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